– At the point in a concert when everyone pulls out their lighters, I always imagine a Fire Marshal standing in the back biting his nails, sweating profusely and repeatedly running his hands through his hair.
– Foursquare: something the Nazi’s would have loved.
– Trains must not have a complex level of thinking, it’s pretty clear they have a one track mind. #pun
– I went to doodle as a distraction at work but my doodle quickly took the form of the Devil. If I’m not mistaken, that happens in the rising action of every horror movie ever.
– The “Star Spangled Banner” is actually supposed to be sung in the Key of Francis Scott.
– To me, laissez-faire always sounded like a carnival of lazy people.
– Whenever I see a sleeping person on the subway, I am flooded with emotions. Pity, confusion, embarrassment (for them) and most importantly, schadenfreude.
Here is the definition of schadenfreude: enjoyment obtained from the troubles of others.
I experience schadenfreude because I secretly hope this sleeping person misses their train stop, wakes up, visibly panics and slowly reflects on how pathetic their situation is and how they brought it all upon themselves. (No offense to Amrou Kotb who slept on the train nightly)
– I imagine that the South by Southwest festival in Texas must be filled with many cheesy advertisements for Southwest Airlines. “Got Southwest on the brain?…So do we!” or “Take Southwest when you head back Northeast.” or, my favorite, “South by Southwest….Airlines.”
– Today, at a convenience store, I witnessed a man open the glass soda door, pick out a Ginger Ale and then leave the glass door ajar. I was taken aback. Like, really dog?
– I was speaking with some friends recently about how DC and Seattle are two of America’s “up and coming” cities. Food, culture, music, nightlife, etc. We then got to talking about how, when we are much older, the “up and coming” cities will seem completely arbitrary and random.
I imagine my grandson saying something like, “Yeah Grandpa, I can’t wait to graduate college and move to Jacksonville.”
I’ll say, “Jacksonville??…Florida? Why would you move there?”
He will roll his eyes and reply, “Oh, well I guess you wouldn’t kn…Jacksonville is an up and coming city. Some really great chefs and bars and five outer neighborhoods – most people call them the Jackson 5 – are really the trendiest places to be right now on the East Coast.”