we got cricket with the quickness and the bassline

– I’m a little sick of this film/TV convention of listing the names of the cast and producers before a movie begins. I find it to be selfishly vain and extremely unnecessary having almost crossed into the realm of ritual. It’s like, “We want you to suspend your disbelief after you pay your respects to these no-name actors and casting directors from LA.”

politics lessons from history: When Andrew Jackson was told that South Carolina was threatening to nullify a federal tariff he replied, “I’ll personally hang the Governor of South Carolina.” South Carolina believed him, and didn’t. If only that kind of behavior would fly today.

“I know you didn’t just say that, Vermont. I know you didn’t just say that.”

– If you think about it, the chorus to that Drake song “Hold On, We’re Goin’ Home” should be queued up on every U.S. Coast Guard ship.

Unless, of course, they are illegal immigrants than “home” is certainly not the place they want to go. Shout out to Mike Del Mauro for the assist.

– New York City’s tourism bureau should employ the slogan: “New York City: Come if you don’t mind walking behind a bunch of people smoking cigarettes on the sidewalk.”

“Look at these happy tourists on Wall Street!”

– I don’t like to think that Socrates enjoyed caramel but, if he did, he would have preferred Riesen.

– Though I haven’t seen it, I can predict that Aaron Paul says the words, “yeah” and “bitch” at some point in the film Need for Speed. I’m sure he gives the people what they want.

– Germany just arrested three men suspected of being prison guards at Auschwitz. They are aged 88, 92 and 94. Wow, great detective work Germany. Only took you fuckin SEVENTY-ONE YEARS! That 94 year old guy must have been sitting in his armchair when he received a knock at the door from the German cops. I’m sure he said something theatric like, “Well, well, well….I knew you’d come. My great-grandchildren thought I was crazy but…I knew.”

“AND IN OTHER NEWS – the German authorities have arrested a Nazi war criminal this afternoon. He has allegedly been hiding in plain sight all of these years at Greenview Cemetery in Munich. He will stand trial in July.”

– As I began reading a library book, I discovered that the 3rd page had been dogeared. I suppose the person before me couldn’t commit to memory that the last paragraph they read was only one page away from the title.

– Various: a cooler name than Darius.

– These days it seems every website is creating their own original content/mini-series. Netflix of course has House of Cards among others, Hulu has that weird show about men in the workplace or something inconsequential like that, and even Amazon just launched Alpha House. My question: where does it end? Soon,  E*Trade will launch some romantic comedy about a stock trader that has to uproot and move to Australia and Buzzfeed will commission a series about Thomas Edison’s little known, yet rebellious son called Bright Ideas.

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